Tears...

I was reading a blog by a mother of 2 who has just gone back to work after 3 months of maternity leave. After reading her blog, tears flow down my eyes. And I felt quite emotional. She was describing her feelings about only having 1-2 hours with her children every nite. And she will sit beside them and watch them sleep, cos she's afraid that she haven't got enough opportunity to see them grow very fast. Babies really grow very fast. Everyday is different with them, as I am experiencing it myself now. At work, she will cry too, thinking of how the children are doing.

I really felt something there as I read, thinking of my situation at the back of my mind... I think I will be very sad too having to leave Aloysius under someone's care, and only having a few hours with him everyday. Haiz... come to think of it... I have been thinking of whether to go to UK to finish up my studies these few days. I wanted to finish it as soon as possible and get on with what I wanna do to expand my business. If I were to go in the next few months, it will be winter. I hated the cold and gloomy winter, so I am not sure if I want to bring Aloysius there. If I were to go there alone, leaving him behind, I will be very sad and will certainly missed him. It's a matter of not being able to see him grow and change daily, nor hear him cry/chuckle/talk, nor hug him, nor shower my love for him, for weeks, if not months... I have thought of going there just for a week, but I cannot bear to leave Aloysius :(. The desire to be with Aloysius might push me to the max to finish up my thesis in a week when I am in the UK. It's a decision that I have to take... I hope I have the strength to face it...